Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
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