Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Randomize
