fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
