i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Randomize
