So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
