I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
