Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
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