Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
