well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
