I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
