so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
