I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
