You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Randomize
