I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
