I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
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