I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
