It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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