i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Randomize
