I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
