i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize