I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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