Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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