About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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