ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
