So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
All the doctor said was why
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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