well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
