she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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