my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Randomize
