this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Randomize
