maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
