I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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