Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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