Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
