Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
i've created a new STD.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
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