He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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