I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Randomize
