I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Randomize
