I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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