Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Randomize
