I'm drive I can fine osifer
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Randomize
