i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
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