Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
