Sponge bath it is.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
There r osticjed everywhere
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Randomize
