So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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