But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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