I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
