omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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