Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
FUCK WHALES
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