you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Randomize
