The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
